Life Exams

Dear Classes of 2022-25

You’ve got this.

Exams are hard to begin with and now you’ve been thrown a curveball. Across the country schools are either still writing exams in person, moving to online or rescheduling – sometimes all three within the same institution. That sure doesn’t help what is already a stressful time. On top of studying many of you are figuring out rapid tests, re-booking train and plane tickets and wondering if you’ll get home to be with your families over the holidays. This is not easy.

Beneath the facts and figures, multiple choice, and essays however, there is deeper learning. 

As you support your floormates with a cup of tea and help your roommate replace their lost ID, you’re building empathy. You may also be developing some for your profs who are changing things on the fly in environments that are traditionally very slow to change.

By adapting to fluid educational realities while also studying and revising travel plans, you’re developing resilience. I know, that’s a buzz word, but it’s true. Your mental toughness is remarkable and your capacity for quick recovery is clear.

With each residence restriction, extra-curricular revision, and inter-varsity reversal you’re building confidence. Confidence in your ability to overcome the next challenge, in your learning from each experience and in the belief that you have the stuff to pursue your next passion.

Empathy, resilience, and confidence. These are precisely the skills your communities, countries and planet will need from their next generation of leaders. They may not be written in the form of exam questions, but they’ll make a bigger impact on your life than any test you’ll ever write.

Accepting all over again

Who knew the pressure of attending University would be harder the second time through?

Check the NO, embrace the MAYBE

earring MAYBE

At 6:21pm last night my daughter lost the backing to her very recently pierced earring in our garage. Our garage is pretty typical, which is to say it’s filthy, so the idea of finding it was a lost cause. This was sort of a big deal because the earrings they use for new piercings have to stay in for six weeks or else there are a host of nasty issues that you’re up against. These earrings also have a specific backing, so replacing it with one of my wife’s wasn’t possible. We scooted over to our local tattoo shop only to learn they don’t do piercings (despite Google’s promises). Shoppers Drug Mart was a long shot and our lone jewelry store was closed. As our daughter had to work the next day and tape or a band aid wasn’t a long-term solution, we were left with one option. Drive the 26km to the next town where the piercing was done. A further complication – it was 6:36pm, the shop closed at 7:00 and they weren’t answering their phone.

“Dad, should we make the drive?” my daughter asked.

I could have said, “NO. It’s too far. We might not make it by 7:00pm.”

Or, “NO. We don’t even know if they’re open.”

Or, “NO. I’ve got to make dinner and feed and walk the dog.”

Or, “NO. I’ve had a long day already and would rather relax on my sun-soaked front porch with a cold drink.”

Instead, I said MAYBE.

“MAYBE they’ll be open.”

“MAYBE we’ll get there before they shut.”

(And to myself): “MAYBE this is an opportunity to connect with my teenager whom I’ve seldom seen this week.”

We arrived at 6:56pm. They were still open. They had a replacement and we asked for another one, just in case. Disaster averted, hugs all round and feeling good about our effort, we decided to go out for dinner. Saying “MAYBE” was the best decision I made all week. For the entire car ride there and back, and during our outdoor meal, we talked. Like, really talked. About life, relationships, self-worth, values, happiness. Meaningful stuff. I listened. I shared my opinion. It was being a dad in all of its best moments.

Parenting is a full-time job and challenging obstacles pop up countless times in countless ways. It’s easy to say NO when things are busy, you’re tired or you have other items on your list to cross off. Sometimes saying NO is the right thing. At other times, if we can check that impulse and embrace the MAYBE, truly great things come from it.

The Covid Cut

covidcut

In times like these I consider this less a bad haircut and more good parenting that emboldens independent thought and co-operative play.

I like you just the way you are

MrRogers

We’re all looking for great entertainment and it’s a bonus when parents can watch with their kids. Two movies that we recently shared together are: Hunt for the Wilderpeople and A Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood. Well worth checking out.

Be well.

Getting euchred

Get euchred

Re-invigorating this game into our lives is proving good fun amongst teens and parents alike if more for the commentary than the actual card play.

Be well.

Happy Father’s Day

dad day 2019.jpg

To all the dad’s out there who, like mine, make themselves available to play, listen and love while providing a rock solid foundation for adventure and exploration – thank you. Happy Father’s Day.

Emoji face

emoji face

Emotions are hard to talk about, perhaps even more so as a teen, so thank god for emojis.

The Best a Man can get… or not?…

gillette

Gillette’s new ad has sparked a lot of discussion and some controversy. Irrespective of whether or not this ad is good or bad, the most valuable part it’s played in our household is sparking conversation, and in a home filled with teenagers, that’s worth something.

Parenting. It’s textbook…

the textbook

Another bit of dinner time magic. I’m pretty sure he was saying this for effect but it’s always good to have a moment each day to touch in on family values, textbooks and lost and found…